Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Ten ways to save yourself from Raksha Bandhan



It is that time of the year when men don't feel like getting out of their homes, socialise with friends or even try the axe deodorants. Because it is that time of the year where women, like ghost busters, roam freely in the busy streets of India in search of brothers.

Yes it is that time of the year which we call Raksha Bandhan. But don't fear because some tips are here to save you the torture. Here are ten ways to save yourself from Raksha Bandhan.

  • When a girl calls you for tying a rakhi, tell her the same dialogue she cracks when you ask her out. Simply say, '' Maine tujhe uss nazar se kabhi dekha nahin hai. I don't mean to hurt, but let's just be friends naa. Sorry!''

P.S: Capture her photo with her expression at that very moment, Instagram it and upload it on Facebook and Twitter to get the maximum likes.

  • Tell her your nick name is Anna (brother in Tamil) and there is no need to tie a rakhi to make you her brother. (it's a lie for a day).


  • Tell her that your school pledge was a lie. Your school made you read it everyday because they did not want another DPS MMS scandal.


  • Kiss her before she ties the rakhi. And tell her that now she cannot tie you a rakhi or else you in literal sense would be called a bhen#%%*


  • Tell her you have a crush on her sister or her sister asked you out and she tying you rakhi means stopping two lovers from mating, I mean meeting.


  • Tell her you are broke and this rakhi you plan to borrow money for the next few months from your new sister


  • Tell her your family is cursed. Simply convince her that anyone who becomes your sister will die in 3 days out of a painful death.


  • Show her your ugliest cousin brother's picture and tell her that in your family the one who becomes your sister should marry your cousin, according to the family traditions.


  • Plaster your hands and say it's a fracture. Convince her that the lightest of the touch there and you could lose your hand.


  • And if nothing works try this, embarrass her by shouting in the public places in Gujju accent saying Here comes my Bhen. Oh my bhen, let's go and watch Coketale in the movie hole. I promise you she will never see you ever again after that, but at least you won't end up being her brother. :P


Issued in public interest! Please share if you care. And remember whatever you do, no matter what the situation is, don't lend your hand to a woman today!

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